My name is Fanny, I am 55 years old, divorced, and since November 2021 I have been under treatment at the Cancer Institute of Milan for metastatic breast cancer.
I am a victim of the consequences of covid: in 2020, in fact, the mammogram exam was missed due to covid restrictions. Then I privately underwent an ultrasound examination that revealed the presence of numerous cysts in the breast; the following year, doctors discover a tumor mass.
The word tumor still evokes a lot of fear, so one is pervaded by an intense fear that there is little time left, and after seeing death in the face, you push forward because there is no other option, and you deal with the various difficulties of life.

In December 2021, I started chemotherapy, then covid stopped me for almost a month, and I resumed at the end of January 2022. The following month my 20-year-old daughter left home, leaving my then 15-year-old son Matteo completely alone to manage the situation: he would come home from school and take care of me, preparing my meals, as I felt sick for 10 days after chemotherapy.

In March 2022, Emma, a 3-month-old puppy from Sicily, arrived home. To the volunteer who came to the house for her pre-adoption, I lied and justified the wool hat indoors with the (real) cold in the house we lived in (it rained inside, and it was full of mold) well aware that if I had told her the actual situation, she probably would not have given her to me. But Matteo had wanted a dog for at least 3 years, and that was the right time for his wish to be fulfilled; he had an intense need for positivity to face the situation he was in.

Emma is 3 years old now, Matteo is 18, and we are facing our difficulties together. After much suffering, since last year we have been in a new house that we like very much. My treatments will not end; mine is a chronic disease that can only be kept under control but not cured due to metastases. I knew I would get sick; I knew it because during my marriage I experienced very intense emotional pain, falling in love with someone for whom I did not exist; there was only him, and when I realized it, it was too late...

As a self-employed person, I do not enjoy any financial benefits, so, being unwell, I started working less and less, and financial difficulties compounded the health ones. The LILT of Milan provided me with a small monthly contribution, and I was (unknowingly) nominated and won the monetary prize "Women for Women against Violence - A Smile for Elena."